This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)
Finally, we are back and live for all of the roadies to indulge in the insanity. Sure, the two weeks off we had essentially flew by buried under the Christmas and New Years holiday shenanigans but that just means we are refreshed, recharged and apparently so filled to the brim with grossness that we couldn't wait to get it out. Seeing as most of what was covered today was what we did while we were away though, it felt fitting to make the main talking point of the show today to be about movies. Sure, Marris got a mashup Ninja Turtles x Street Fighter clothing set and Angi is already planning a spring break trip to Spain but the biggest deep dive ended up being content. Sure, Angi finished Game of Thronesand rewatched every season of Project Runwaybut her most eye opening experience came from seeing the psycho sexual thriller Saltburn. As Angi described it, the movie is simply nuts and she had to rave about it. Personally, I'm going to watch it this coming Monday but Angi needed to let everyone know that there is plenty to unpack in it. After having it suggested to her by a friend, she settled down for a watch of it with Jay the Straight and was not disappointed. The main draw of the movie is the shock scenes that are sexually explicit and have caused memes to occur because of how insane they are. For example, at half an hour in, the main character drinks and audibly slurps the bath water of a friend that had just been jerking it in said tub. This scene has elicited so much thirst that you can even find a "jerked bath water" candle on Etsy that smells like a shower and pennies. Obviously, Marris is not keen on smelling such a disgusting piece but he is more than willing to assault his senses in different ways. While Angi watched boys be boys, Marris was busy taking in an Aquaman. That's right, Marris was one of the eight people who saw the final gasp of the DCEU Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom. He entered the theater with the lowest of expectations and the movie did not disappoint by never being good in the slightest. He did explain though that Jason Momoa looked like he was having fun but the fact that the movie did a version of hand holding by explaining what was occurring every five minutes via dialogue was apparently a turn off. Obviously, Marris explained, there is a better way to do exposition but this was a one and a half star stinker. Meanwhile, Angi gave Saltburn four stars. However, the biggest movie over break was Wonka, which is actually a secret musical and has Hugh Grant or Walt as an oompa loompa in it.
Other Stuff from Today's Show:
As I mentioned though, disgusting things were the big sticking points of the show this morning and so I'll open with one and close with one while stuffing the Daily Discussion Topic in the middle of this gross sandwich. Starting off and continuing for the rest of the week is the three part series that Angi came up with while she was probably in the tub, considering if any weirdo she ever dated would drink her bathwater. Do Not Insert is the talking point you did not know you needed to hear about and probably don't want to know about. Part one will focus on things people stuck in their weiners in 2023, with part two focusing on vaginas and rounding us out with part three and the booty. Angi, investigative journalist, had to wonder if it feels good to stick things in one's pee hole because there is no other reason why these idiots were putting things in there, right? As Marris cringed and screamed internally (we all did,) here is what we found out dudes stuffed in their pee holes last year.
A phone charger, a rolled up bandaid, a crayon, a plastic spoon, a plastic fork, candle wax, a straw, folded up dollar bills, a yellow neck chain, a 10 inch long vibrator, a screwdriver, a knife handle, a condiment bottle, another necklace.
After going over this horror show list, we learned that Marris and Prison Tattoo have never stuck anything of the sorts inside their pee holes. That said, Prison Tattoo then introduced us to the teeth clenching nightmare that is "sounding" which involves sticking stainless steel rods of varying length and size inside the pee hole to cause more blissful orgasms. If you thought this was hell yet you were strangely curious, check in tomorrow for part two about vaginas.
Right then, if you're done screaming into the void then let's take a look at our first Daily Discussion Topic of the new year. Today's topic spawned from Angi scrolling through Facebook memories and seeing some of the dumb things that she used to post. In the heyday of Facebook, when it made sense to actually post on it, Angi fondly recalled status updates that basically mapped out her whole day (guess that explains all that stalking.) It was a memory from 11 years ago that caused her to move away from cringing and embrace a time she got yelled at for "breaking the rules" (as we learned today, Angi can never win.) The post showcased her standing outside of a Wiz Khalifa show selling a truckload of Girl Scout cookies. This triggered a reminder of when she wanted to dress up as a slutty Girl Scout and sell cookies in the lobby of the iHeart building. Knowing any content is good content, she mentioned the plan on air and that caused Mothers Against Fun to band together and complain to the Girl Scouts that she was using "hoochie tactics" to get a selling advantage in. If she was to simply walk up and down the aisles of iHeart and demand people buy cookies because they see her in the halls, that was fine but making the transaction fun was against the rules it seemed. This inspired her to wonder what the roadies had to sell either when they were back in school or for their own kids. Marris was full of options from jump rope for heart health, holiday candles, cookies, chocolate and even a t-shirt fundraiser held for a classmate with a brain tumor. As for myself, when we were in 8th grade, we put on a haunted house that we had to design and then construct with the help of our parents in the school gym for which the profits went to ... honestly, I can't remember. Angi also recalled selling wrapping paper when it used to feel safe going door to door of strangers homes as well as chocolate. Before getting to the roadies though, that $8,000 in cookies that Angi sold fetched a $30 Razor scooter as a reward. Onward to Laura, who sold expensive wrapping paper door to door usually by herself and sometimes with her younger sister. Something like that these days seems like it would never happen as I said but back in the day, it was YOLO. Justin sold super expensive Christmas wreaths that were done by a mom and pop shop. His $7,000 turn out got him a $50 baseball glove. Bill helped with boy scouts and had to sell popcorn, which led to him having a whole garage full of it. He also rallied against church-run casino nights. Cory had to sell candy bars and when picking them up, gave a fake name so he was able to eat all of them on his own. Kim sold magazines and had to force everyone to buy Teen Beat and National Geographic. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.
Finally, we cap this return to form with another dosage of disgust. When she wasn't busy watching TV and movies, Angi had a massive crab boil on New Year's Eve. While she was doing this, Marris was indulging in a yearly tradition of his own which found him enjoying pig brain tacos. Before you start to close these notes in disgust, know that Marris said they are absolutely delicious but after eating five of them his initial time and learning what he was ingesting, the appeal sort of dipped off. Apparently, they are very well seasoned and blended with the texture and consistency of a crab cake with a deep fried taco to balance it all out. However, the idea that they are pig brains is now deep in his brain so at this year's festivities, he only had one but it was still delicious. While Angi was disgusted, she needed to know more and so the grossest thing they've ever eaten was explored. For Marris, that honor goes to chitlins, which he said are absolutely disgusting and can not be disguised to be made better. For Angi, oysters for her are like enjoying snot and she is not down with that. This was further pushed the time she had one and it tasted metallic going down. They did say that if seasoned though, crickets are apparently great. Well then, who wants breakfast?
Request Wars 3.0
Current Champion: Marris (3x)
Angi's Song Choice: “It's So Easy” by Guns N' Roses
Marris' Song Choice: "So Cold" by Breaking Benjamin
Winner: Angi
10 O' Clock Toast:
Toastee: Snoop Dogg
He will be joining the coverage of the upcoming Summer Olympics by offering commentary, visiting with athletes and their families, checking out landmarks and going to events. In other news, every US athlete was disqualified this summer for being high.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
"I have no life, no purpose unless I'm doing this show." - Angi